Purple Oasis

If there is some paperwork to be done ,I’ll be there to hate it!

I like being organised and rule abiding but if it involves paperwork , for me it also involves procrastination,cribbing,cursing and finding a hundred excuses not to do it .
For years I have been trying to find someone to whom I can outsource any paperwork , unsuccessful so far.Tried bribing my friends and family into
doing it – fill insurance forms , apply for driving license ,file taxes but they’ve grown immune to it now.
I’ve gone without paying insurance,submitting expenses claims or renew license for long periods of time. I’ve had sleepless nights when the deadline is approaching but my paperwork is still pending.

I wish life was much simpler where everyone just took our word for it and didn’t need to show any document for proof .

Or do you know if there is a name for this ‘fear of paperwork’ so I could just submit a document saying I have this phobia and get away with not having to do anymore of it .

Let me know

Being a mom gives you one big leap of maturity ,I guess.

Once you are a mother , you always feel that you fall short of things you do.
Transforming from the carefree individual to a doting mom whose lives revolves around your children.
Complaining about not finding enough ‘me time’ but get restless when you’re out catching a break with friends.
From riding 2-wheelers in Bangalore at breakneck speed and fallen many a times or come back home late night unaccompanied but worrying about the safety of your children while they’re at school or out playing .
You are always on the lookout for that best dress or the most interesting book or the most safe toy or the most child friendly show on tv.And yet you aren’t convinced you did your best.

There’s no downtime in your world..no room for mistakes .You set a high benchmark for yourself the day you became a mom ,didn’t you ?

There are somethings which are exhausting ,mentally . To stay calm in the face of adversity , to let go , to decide.

To walk away from the present in seach of yourself and all things which make you happy.

You think and wonder if you chose the right path .When there is an explosion of emotions and thoughts spiralling down which you pray don’t take you down with them.
You feel you are falling down a rabbit hole……hoping that at the end of it , an exciting adventure awaits.Just like Alice. Alice in Wonderland.

Would you stay safe where you are or risk it all?

Have you ever got a spur of the moment haircut or one after prolonged research on when,where, how?

Got bored and got the next best(?) haircut . Or contemplated for days, flipped through magazines,googled,had group discussion and debates with friends and got the most suitable(?again) haircut .
I’ve done both and it’s all awesome until…..until someone flips their hair.

And it’s that slow flip ( in my head) and then you get into an existential crisis.You start questioning yourself.You life decisions. Everything.

When you get it short , you can’t wait for it to grow back so that you can flip it….slowly and awesomely and then there is a light breeze and it’s springtime and there’s music playing in the background and the light morning sun flickering through those long silky locks and you’re laughing and you continue living in a parallel universe.

When you’ve managed to grow you hair long and then you see someone with a shorter smarter do and you suddenly picture yourself looking smarter and confident with shorter hair and generally being a badass.

You can never please yourself , can you?

Has it ever happened to you?

Have you ever tasted a lemon which did not give you that sour shock? Or an orange which wasn’t citrus enough? That banana with spotless skin… Did you go looking for a strong flavorful onion but ended up with a white ,sweet smelling one ?

Did you feel that pinch when in the lookout for the best, you missed what you initially wanted? A world where we have tried to change the very essence of something in the search for perfection – that shiny looking lemon which does not smell citrus-y and remind you of the sea , the orange which tastes too sweet for it’s own good , the smooth yellow banana which shows no sign of ageing inspite of being ripe ……or when you find yourself stripped of your very own essence.

That easy breezy attitude you changed because you wanted to sound ‘no nonsense’. The impishness you supressed to impress someone. The snarkiness you polished to sound diplomatic and fit in. That quirky sense of humor you let go because it made you look ‘not serious’……..did you lose the essence of who you are………while trying to be perfect?

P.S : Did you watch the AirBnB ad ‘Together in Berlin’? It captures the essence of 2 friends/partners exploring and having fun without a care in the world.Linking it below for you.